Brain Candy! A Semi-Liveblog

Have we ever talked about my fear of transportation? Basically, any mode of transport that is not the feet I came from the womb in possession of makes me nervous. That nervousness increases exponentionally in relation to the speed at which that mode of transportation travels. like this:

Feet---->skateboard--->Bus--->car--->train--->airplane

Feet being totally fine, airplanes being screaming hysterical abject terror.



I am flying to New York City tomorrow, so like any responsible American who is lucky enough to have health insurance, I schlepped my ass to the doctor and asked for some anti-anxiety meds. She obliged. I took one 20 minutes ago as a test run. Let's see what happens!

1:10- I feel pretty good. I don't like to think about my actual, physical brain too much, but I think it feels slightly different. But nothing is stressing me out. I should do something about that, in order to truly test my response to the drugs.

1:14- I just turned the TV on in an attempt to let Fox News have its way with me, but that particular channel is not coming in today. Turned it to Headline News. They were talking about Dems possibly booting Lieberman, and instead of the wave of glee I was expecting, I just felt okay with it.

1:16- Oooooh, Palin's on CNN!! this oughta do it!!

1:17- All I feel is confusion as to why people are still asking this woman questions.

1:20- Seriously. Why? I'm gonna go google image search something

results for "funnest thing ever"



Jared Padalecki?!?! I could not possibly disagree more. Jess Mariano FTW



That thing looks pretty fun, kid, but I've got two words for you: Parachute Day.

results from "what should I have for lunch?"



Dude, it's not that hard.



I would very much like to.

1:30- I feel nothing inside. Mission accomplished!!

I'll add more today as the need strikes me.

2:51- Landon just told me I looked dull eyed. I want a pizza.

3:32- How do medicated people get anything done? I just moved the cursor around and stared at it like I wasn't the one controlling it for a full three minutes.

Zenergize- Liveblog!!

Last weekend I found Zenergize at Whole Foods! (for back-story, go read this.) Shit is expensive, y'all. It was like, 9 bucks for a tube of ten tablets! But I had to find out if it was awesome. I'm curious like a cat. That's why my friends call me Whiskers.

So, in order to fully document the Zenergize experience, I will liveblog all the action startiiiiiing... now!

9:21am- I have opened the Zenergize tube and removed one tablet. I smell the tablet. It smells like peaches. Hopefully it doesn't have too much actual peach in it, as I am allergic to raw fruit. But now that I think about it, there is no way to get a raw peach into a tablet.
9:23am- I have just dropped the tablet into a glass of water. It is fizzing, as was expected. While it dissolves, I will pay attention to the Paula Abdul album I am listening to this morning. Did you know that Paula Abdul is hella Jewish? I just learned that this morning. I read her Wikipedia article.
9:25am- The tablet is almost done dissolving. Are you excited? I am.
9:26am- Still dissolving. What's that adage about the watched tablet?
9:27am- I just read the tube, and it suggests breaking the little fucker in half so it dissolves faster. I wish I'd done that because I am starting to get bored. Paula Abdul's Spellbound is just not as good right now as it was when I was 9. Remember the Rush, Rush video, where she got all Rebel Without a Cause with Keanu Reeves? Speaking of Keanu Reeves, I heard he's dating Parker Posey. that's weird, right?
9:31am- It's finally done dissolving!! that took eight fucking minutes! Okay, I'm gonna take a sip...
9:32am- OH MY GOD IT IS DELICIOUS. more sipping.
9:33am- P. Abdul album has definitely taken a turn for the worse. It's gone all Paul Simon Graceland imperialist African romanticizing bullshit. more sipping.
9:37am- Album almost over. I have decided to listen to The Stooges, but I can't decide which album.
9:38am-I have decided to go with Raw Power.
9:39am- Oh, man, that was a good decision.
9:40am- Zenergize remains delicious and is almost gone.
9:41am- Gone. That was fun. Did I mention that it had caffeine in it? It doesn't say how much, though. I really think beverages should tell you how much caffeine is in them so you can plan accordingly.


Well, that was fun. I'm gonna go eat something delicious. Have a fun day, dudes!

More!!!

10:06am- I. FEEL. AWESOME. The caffeine has kicked in and I think it is kind of a lot dudes.
10:08am- I just got up on my bed and danced like the kid in Hedwig and the Angry Inch. but with less jumping up and down because I have a futon.
10:25- Okay, I am starting to feel a little crazy....CRAZY AWESOME!!!!
10:51- I seem to have leveled out, and feel like a normal human being again.